I have really wanted to post more frequently but this has been a very busy week. My semester starts next week and I'm teaching 3 different courses in two different colleges. Today was my son's last day at his wonderful fabulous daycare that he's been at since 5 months and next week is his first day of pre-school. I have had an emotionally challenging week at my primary job this week that has led me to re-evaluate my priorities and explore other opportunities. On top of all this I have been trying to plan fun activities for my son on the days we are home together and keep my domicile to a minimum mess however there's a mound of dishes and glasses in the sink because I'm too tired to empty the dishwasher, I have mounds of laundry that need washing, there are so many toys strewn about my house that it looks likean obstacle course, and I have had a pesky fly bizzing around my house for days that I cannot seem to swat.
Somehow with all of the above going on, I have managed to keep up with my cleanse. All of these "to-do's" make me feel anxious, overwhelmed, insecure, depleted and worried that I am going to forget something which will eventually end with me disappointing someone or just feeling guilty. This is EXACTLY the type of emotional jumble that makes me want to eat as if food or the act of chewing will somehow make it all go away. I know that emotional eating does not help. Inevitably it just intensifies it. Ironically, food and my consumption of food this week is the only thing I don't feel anxious about. Even as I compose this post, I am sipping my detox tea.
Food is the one thing I haven't really had to worry about as I know what I can and cannot eat. I have less meals to plan. I have noticed that knowing I will have a shake for breakfast and a shake for lunch...now I sound like a Slimfast commercial but seriously...knowing those decisions are already made and that I still have some options in terms of what kind and add-ins for my shake satisfies my need for control and variety. I have even managed to eat out on a few occasions this week (once for dinner and once for lunch) and make really sound choices that fit within the cleanse clean eating guidelines.
Today I made afternoon snack for my son's final day at his daycare. I made a dark chocolate mousse. It is one of Tosca Reno's recipes and calls for silken tofu, dark chocolate chips, almond milk, and vanilla. It's super easy to make and I portioned it in 5 ounce Dixie cups. I also brought a fruit salad, cookies for the kids, and organic lite pink lemonade from Whole Foods. I had some fruit, I had a couple spoonfuls of mousse which was totally not on the cleanse but I it is freakin' delicious. I couldn't pass it up but a couple of weeks ago, I would have inhaled that sucker. I drank water with a fizz stick. I did not have a cookie.
It's Friday night of Labor Day Weekend and we are having friends over on Sunday for a cookout but my one friend is GF so that helps with menu planning. I have free range chicken to grill, lots of tomatoes, and we received lots of fresh corn from our share this week. I do feel like I earned 1 cocktail but I'll see how I feel about that as the weekend progresses.
I love how relate-able your posts are. Natalie, I think it's amazing that through all of the emotions you've been experiencing this past week, you didn't stray from the plan. It's so easy to use these difficult times as an excuse to cheat but I want you to know that by sticking to it, you're not adding one more stress to your life. Keep up the great work!!
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